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How's that old song go? "Breaking up is hard to do"?

For about the last nine months, Emerson and Carter have been going to the same school/day care on Milwaukee's West side. It's been great for both of them, and for the most part, we've been very happy with the school. About a year ago however, we decided to try to get Emerson into a K-4 school a bit closer to our home that came highly recommended by friends and neighbors. So we put an application in just about a year early with the hope of getting Emerson a spot by the start of the '09 school year which started a few weeks ago.

Unfortunately, word about what a great program this particular school is well known within the City and we were placed on a wait list last Winter. As the months progressed, we were hopeful a spot would open up, but to ensure she was able to get a spot in her current school, we had to apply there as well. When the end of August came and went, we were a bit disappointed that no spots opened up but were happy to wait it out another year in hopes of having her in "for sure" for K-5.

As things like this seem to go, we were contacted three days after the start of the school year by the K-4 school we were on the waiting list for and told that a spot had opened up for Emerson which we jumped on immediately. So on September 4th, she started her new K-4 school.

She's a pretty easy going kid so I wasn't too worried about the switch from her standpoint. It also helped that one of our neighbors down the street also had a girl in the same classroom that Emerson would know right away.

What did cause some uneasiness was letting her old school know about the change. Obviously, her previous teacher was disappointed that Emerson would be leaving and wanted to know if it was anything to do with her teaching style or the school in general. I said that no, it wasn't anything in particular. But how do you relay the decision that you obviously think one school is better than another (or else why would you move your child?) to those at the old school? It was uncomfortable trying to walk that line of praising her old school and teacher while explaining our decision to transfer her.

The complicating factor in this whole thing is that Carter still goes to Emerson's "old" school. Often times while dropping him off or picking him up, I bump into one of Emerson's previous teachers or one of the administrators there.

It may just be me, but the cheery "Good mornings!" that used to be a staple of my daily routine at the "old" school have been replaced by awkward "Hi's" and averted eyes. I feel the mood towards us is much different now that Emerson has moved to her new school and that's a bit disappointing as we still have one child going to that school and I would expect any teacher or administrator to treat each family the same whether they had one or three kids going to their school.

I get the distinct feeling that every time I walk by a couple administrators at the "old" school while dropping off Carter, they whisper to themselves, "Well I wonder when they'll be pulling Carter out…".

Like I said, maybe it's just me and my active imagination at play. While I certainly hope that's the case, I get the feeling from time to time it's not. As many parents know, a critical part of how our children do in school is the relationship between the parents and the staff at the school where they attend.

I hope that unlike in the Neil Sedaka song, this situation is seen as less of a "break up" and more of a "moving on".