Life-threatening illnesses aside, I can think of no other childhood ailment that causes more motherly distress than allergies.  For the last few weeks, my daughter has been breaking out into hives.  We don't know why, and it is really stressing me out.  At first, we thought it was something she ate because the hives were all over, even behind her ears!  I racked my brain, trying to think of what it could be, but she hasn't eaten anything new.  She is not big on change when it comes to food. 

We haven't changed lotions or soaps.  She has eczema, so we only use unscented products formulated for sensitive skin.  I only use Dreft detergent for her clothes. 

The break outs have occurred at different times and on different days of the week. There is no pattern, no common denominator that is readily apparent to me. The not knowing is what is driving me up the wall.

My daughter is a trooper though.  She takes her antihistamine with little complaint, but I think my freaking out is stressing her out.  As I checked her hives for the umpteenth time the other day, she said, "Mom, this is getting annoying."  

I've talked with other moms.  Of course it didn't help my stress level when I found out from one mom that her daughter was diagnosed with "chronic hives" of unknown origin.  Great.

We have an upcoming appointment with an allergist.  I'm hoping we'll be able to nail it down. 

I try and reassure myself that I am doing all that I can do, but I still worry.

I can't help it.  I just want to figure it out and make it better.  That's what moms do. 

I am a fairly intelligent, confident woman.  I am surrounded by healthcare providers in my family.  Yet,  I am  somewhat "intimidated" when I accompany my daughter to her doctor appointments.  

Don't get me wrong.  If I saw or heard anything that was a serious problem, I would have no qualms speaking my mind, but it's the little things that make me second guess myself.  I almost always give the benefit of the doubt to the physician/nurse/lab tech because I figure this is their job and they know what they're doing.  I don't want to be the "Pushy Mom".

However, recent events have made me rethink that.

In my last blog, I mentioned that I was taking my daughter to the allergist.  After her appointment, my daughter had to go to the lab to have blood work done.  This was the first time that she would have blood drawn.  In the clinic, her doctor suggested that numbing cream be applied to her skin so that she would not feel the needle stick.  So, a nurse came in, applied the cream to both arms, and stated that the cream should stay on for 30 minutes.

We went to the lab and handed in our paperwork.  When I handed the intake clerk the forms, I told her about the numbing cream and told her what time it had been applied.  She said she would make a note of it.

Well, 20 minutes later (NOT 30), we were called into the lab.  At this point, I should have said something to the lab tech about the time, but this is where the second guessing myself started. 

I figured the lab tech would have noticed the note about the time, that there was nothing to be concerned about, that she knew what she was doing.

Then, knowing something about having blood drawn, having been subjected to it myself on a regular basis, I mentioned to the lab tech that the veins on my daughter's left arm looked better than on her right.

So, the lab tech removes the cream and covering bandage on her RIGHT arm, either not hearing what I just said or, more likely, ignoring the advice coming from "The Pushy Mom."  The tech doesn't even bother to check the left arm.

So, again, I second guess myself and don't press the issue, thinking the tech does this everyday to dozens of children.

Well, you can probably guess what happened.  The lab tech didn't hit the vein, and my daughter felt it (although I think the cream did have some effect because she wasn't crying).  The lab tech ended up having to stick her left arm, the BETTER arm, after all.

After all of that, I couldn't help myself and had to get in a little dig by saying, "Well, I guess I was right about the left arm being better."  No response from the tech.  (Yes, I know it was bad form, but it made me feel a teeny bit better.)

I felt bad about not being a better advocate for my child on that day.

As moms, we know our children the best.  Yet, we hold back, thinking that others know best.  Sometimes they do, but sometimes they don't.  And you won't know which it is until it's too late.  So embarrassment and second guessing be damned, we need to speak up.

I am Pushy Mom.  Hear me roar.